Supporting Mental Health in Adolescence: A Guide for Parents and Families

Adolescence is a pivotal time in anyone's life. Everything is in motion and changing. Our bodies change, our minds and brains change. Hormonal change affects our mental and physical bodies. We start having stronger romantic emotions and start looking for potential partners. We are faced with new challenges in life through education and we start working. We meet new people at work and at universities. We are treated as adults and expectations of people change. There is a lot to learn while grappling with all these new challenges in life. It can be an extremely stressful time in life but also rewarding with enough support and guidance. Interestingly, these are the times when young adults start experiencing mental health issues. It could be due to challenges in life and changes in the physiology of our mind and body.

In Australia and around the world, there is a sudden increase in the suicide rate after the age of 20. 75% of those who take their own life are male (ABS, 2022).

Parents and family can play a huge role in the lives of their children. Here are some of the ways that parents can help and support their children.

Be aware of one's own family history of mental health. There is a significant genetic component in mental health just as conditions like blood pressure and diabetes. The higher the number of people in the family that have mental health issues and the closer the genetic relation, the higher the chance of inheriting such conditions. It is helpful to talk about the family history of mental health in a non-judgmental and non-stigmatizing way. Share your stories about your mental health in a way that does not come across as who had a harder time and overcame mental health issues.

Talk about the medication that you or another family member might be taking for mental health. Doctors often ask about family history of mental health issues and medications they take as part of diagnosing mental health issues. We often find that there is little communication in families about mental health. I find that young people whose families are open about their mental health and approach the subject in a non-stigmatized way have a better chance of recovery. Start this conversation early. Make home a safe space for talking about mental health.

Monitor your children for significant and prolonged emotional changes and social withdrawal. If you do notice that your children are having behavioural changes, be mindful that they might be having issues with their mental health. There are other things happening in their lives that can affect them, such as relationships, financial hardships, bullying including cyberbullying, drug and alcohol use, loss of sense of belonging, and study pressures.

Be there for them. Practise active listening without offering solutions or trying to fix their problems. Stop doing what you are doing and give them your full attention. Ideal time for all parties involved is not always possible. Acknowledge their issues and concerns and use phrases like "it must be hard," "I understand," "I hear you." Let them know you love them often. Ask them permission before asking questions.

Educate yourself about mental health and some of the common mental health issues that young people face, such as anxiety and depression. Anxiety and depression as medical conditions are different from the intermittent emotions of anxiousness and low mood that everyone feels every now and then. Anxiety and depression often coexist. People wake up feeling mood changes for no reason and are not able to "shake it off" or "snap out of it". Joy in doing fun things that were once enjoyable is no longer present. People become irritable and short-tempered. They often get annoyed with themselves for feeling this way and have unspoken regrets after snapping at their family.

Learn about the resources available.

Resources and support

If you or someone near you is in immediate danger of suicide:

• call triple zero (000); or

• go to the nearest hospital emergency department

If you are having negative thoughts and need someone to talk to:

• call Lifeline on 13 11 14

• Call Suicideline on 1300 651 251

• call Beyond Blue on 1300 22 4636

• talk to:

  • a GP, counsellor, psychologist or psychiatrist

  • family or friends

Give them space and let them know that you are there for them. Keep reminding yourself that it might not be something you have done,

and even though it's hard, don't take it personally. Where does one start? Offer to take them to see a doctor. You may get replies along the lines of "what's a doctor going to do?" If they are reluctant, you could suggest a health check-up and discuss mental health. Often, it might be easier to discuss their personal issues with a health professional in privacy rather than close family members. Remind them that it is confidential. We, as health professionals, often pick up cues from body language and initiate discussions about mental health, and quite often we pick up issues such as drug and alcohol abuse and bullying. We are often the gateway to guide them towards professional counselling. The earlier that process of counselling starts, the quicker the recovery process.

If they are attending university, have a look at the university website. Larger universities often offer free counselling, and they might have medical facilities which they can use free of charge or for a small fee. Seeing a psychologist can be expensive, and if as a parent you are in a position to support their counselling, consider offering to pay for counselling. The cost of counselling will pay off multiple times in their future.

If you have insurance with extra cover, check to see if it covers counselling. In Australia, counselling is subsidised through Medicare. See the article about Mental Health Treatment Plans, which your doctor can organise.

Be aware that if they are having a bad day, it might not always be something you did. Let them rest. Offer gestures of support, such as making them a drink while they are studying.

Model healthy behaviours and maintain routines in your own life, such as exercising, going for walks, and maintaining a routine to life. Our children often model our behaviours.

Celebrate small victories, such as making their bed, going for a walk, or washing the car.